You can learn a lot about how to be more effective with in business by looking at how children operate and their state of mind. You don’t need to coach children to play and live at a higher performance, or let go of stress or negative thinking. Perhaps they should be providing us business coaching!
‘We need to get out of the house in 5 minutes’ I remind my son hoping the warning will result in a stress free departure. The pace of life in Cornwall is far more stress free than the rat-race of London however it is not completely free of time-based activities!
Like many little children his age getting dressed is not his favourite activity. Why should he get dressed if he prefers to be naked? He has the emotional freedom to enjoy it. We very rarely have to be out of the door by a certain time in the morning but from time to time it happens.
Knowing how to utilise my sons intrinsic motivation means we rarely have ‘to go in to battle’ over getting dressed keeping it stress free, however there are some times when I am in low thinking when I get caught up in my own thinking and forget the bigger picture/his needs and before we know it we are in an unhelpful exchange with causes stress for both him and me.
When these times happen I realise it is my thinking that creates the experience, whether positive or not so positive. I am either caught up in my thoughts/worries/anxieties and stress about getting out on time or free of my thoughts and are at peace and are experience wellbeing which allows me to be present and have a more positive exchange with my son.
Who would you be without your thoughts?
Our thoughts create our experience in life.
Our feelings are a result of our thoughts, they go hand in hand. Change your thoughts, change your experience. The thing is our thoughts are quite deceptive. They paint this picture of ‘reality’ but then tell us they are a result of this ‘reality’ not the creator of it.
My thoughts were telling me we are going to be late and x, y z is going to happen so ‘I need to ensure my son gets dressed now, I haven’t got time to play games..etc. etc.’
In business our thinking runs away with us worrying about deadlines, keeping clients happy, the consequences of late deliveries etc. etc.
However, they are just thoughts, an illusion – not truth. With business coaching I help business leaders understand this. I don’t know if we were going to be late. I don’t know if the person I was meeting was going to be delayed, I don’t know whether being late would be a good thing for all sorts of unknown reasons. I am creating my own ‘movie’ of the future. It is not true.
At work we get caught up in experiencing the ‘reality’ of our thinking – about the client being upset etc. How often do we worry about things but they don’t actually materialise? Nothing can predict the future – not even our thinking.
“We don’t see things as they are but as we are.‘ Anais Nin
When I catch myself in this way of thinking, driven by stress and anxiety as a result of my thinking I can remind myself it is just my thoughts. They pass like clouds, they come and they go. My thoughts are not reality, they create an illusion of reality.
When we let go of our thinking we can return to the present moment. That is when we get clarity of mind, we can be more effective, make decisions easier and see solutions we may have missed. We operate at a higher level of performance, get bigger results all with a greater sense of wellbeing. It makes good business sense!
Nothing is good or bad, but thinking makes it so. Shakespeare
When I let them go, I can be in touch with our natural state, peace and wellbeing. Just like the blue sky, is always there even when it is hidden from us by the clouds, our peace, wellbeing and inner wisdom is always in us but often hidden by our thinking.
When I do this I feel the stress and anxiety dissipate and I am left with that sense of peace enabling me to be more in the moment, loving and kind regardless of what is happening around me. I am no longer affected by events around me. Things cannot ‘make me feel stressed or anxious’. It is very empowering to know it is only my thoughts creating my anxiety which means I have the power to let them go. It is not reliant on anyone else doing anything.
One business leader I was coaching recently realise how here thinking resulting her taking on more responsibility than she needed to which was adding more work and stress and lowering her enjoyment of work. She let go of this thinking and found she her performance shot up as did her enjoyment.
If you want help letting go of your thoughts, the ‘reality’ created by your thoughts (based on past experience. beliefs, values etc.) whether in life or business then contact me and let’s see how I can help you at my Cornwall practice.
